There's pretty much nothing I love more than to see Diverge kids sincerely worshiping God. It makes me cry every time.
This morning was awesome as always, but the worship set was particularly amazing. God was extremely present. Not in a heavy way like last week but in a very peaceful, joyful, uplifting way. Especially when we were singing "Mighty to Save". I took a look back behind me during one of the choruses and every Diverge kid in the back row had their eyes closed and some had their arms in air just worshiping the amazing God that we love and loves us. It was awesome. It made me sing even louder than I already was (sorry to everyone around me ha). I just love seeing their true hearts. They're teenagers and every single one of them has their issues and they make mistakes just like the rest of us. And sometimes I get so frustrated when they make decisions that they know are wrong, but when I see them truly worshiping, it reminds me that deep down they know God and one day they'll get it. I guess all of us are like that to a certain extent though.
I love my kids. They are the best. It's tough sometimes, but I'm extremely grateful God called me to youth ministry. I wouldn't trade it for anything :)
Sunday, December 14, 2008
Wednesday, December 10, 2008
Thoughts
I've been trying to figure out a lot of things recently. I have no clue where my life is heading and I feel like my attachments have shifted. I used to think that I couldn't imagine leaving Tallahassee or Genesis or Diverge or my friends here before I absolutely had to. But now, I feel like I've become okay with the possibility of moving. I used to be terrified of the unknown. The idea of living in a city where I knew no one and nothing about freaked me out. And the idea of leaving the people and the church that I love so much broke my heart. But honestly, I think I could use the change. And I'm starting to think that maybe God is shaping my heart to be okay with it.
GenesisChurch.tv means the world to me. I want nothing more to see it grow to be the church God created it to be. And I want to be a part of it. I want to see Diverge explode and become a place where broken teenagers come and find hope, peace, and love in God like crazy. I want to see Fuse become a ministry that equips young men and women to become passionate, on fire followers of Jesus. It will happen.
I have no idea what will happen in the next year and a half. Or where God will have me or what He has in store for me. All I know is how my heart feels right now. And how it feels is that it's gradually becoming more and more okay with the idea of change. (Which is a huge deal for me). I absolutely love my friends. They are my family. But I feel my heart pulling away a little bit so that it won't be the end of the world to be away from them. It's a weird feeling.
All this started when I was thinking about grad school yesterday. When I decided I was going to get my master's I just automatically figured I'd stay here in Tally and stay at FSU. But then I began thinking of other states that I could see myself living in. Possibly Texas or North or South Carolina. I have family there. As well as Tennessee. I have no idea which schools in these states have a Guidance Counseling program but I'm going to look into it. I need to start getting an idea of possibilities.
I never thought I would catch myself thinking positively of making a drastic change. It's not like me at all. I've always been someone who liked her little box and didn't like when things began to shift around and throw everything off. But I've got the sudden urge to shake things up a bit.
New people, new places, a fresh start... that sounds really good.
Anyone know of any great schools with Counseling programs?
GenesisChurch.tv means the world to me. I want nothing more to see it grow to be the church God created it to be. And I want to be a part of it. I want to see Diverge explode and become a place where broken teenagers come and find hope, peace, and love in God like crazy. I want to see Fuse become a ministry that equips young men and women to become passionate, on fire followers of Jesus. It will happen.
I have no idea what will happen in the next year and a half. Or where God will have me or what He has in store for me. All I know is how my heart feels right now. And how it feels is that it's gradually becoming more and more okay with the idea of change. (Which is a huge deal for me). I absolutely love my friends. They are my family. But I feel my heart pulling away a little bit so that it won't be the end of the world to be away from them. It's a weird feeling.
All this started when I was thinking about grad school yesterday. When I decided I was going to get my master's I just automatically figured I'd stay here in Tally and stay at FSU. But then I began thinking of other states that I could see myself living in. Possibly Texas or North or South Carolina. I have family there. As well as Tennessee. I have no idea which schools in these states have a Guidance Counseling program but I'm going to look into it. I need to start getting an idea of possibilities.
I never thought I would catch myself thinking positively of making a drastic change. It's not like me at all. I've always been someone who liked her little box and didn't like when things began to shift around and throw everything off. But I've got the sudden urge to shake things up a bit.
New people, new places, a fresh start... that sounds really good.
Anyone know of any great schools with Counseling programs?
Friday, September 26, 2008
So I may have gotten a little behind...
Well, I obviously failed at the whole blogging throughout my Italy trip thing. Ha. It was just too difficult. There was so much going on that I couldn't keep up with blogging about it. It was the trip of a lifetime though. I absolutely loved it. There are no words.
I'm not even going to attempt to fully catch up on everything that has happened in the last year. So much stuff has gone on that it would take me hours to write it all down. I'll try to state just brief lessons I learned.
- The main one is that I give my heart away way to easily. I've had my heart broken twice in the past seven months. The first was the worst thing I've ever had to go through. But through it, I learned how much strength I have inside of me and how much I have with God. I really don't know how people get through times like that without God. I know I couldn't have without Him. The second I'm still semi-dealing with. It's nothing like the first, but I'm still slowly gaining my heart back and giving it back to God. (Which is where it should have stayed.) There was a minor heart ache between the two but I think I knew that that was not where my heart needed to be the whole time so it wasn't as bad.
I really need to learn how to not give away my heart so easily. I need to learn how to find full satisfaction in God and not in relationships. That goes for my friendships too. I put so much of my heart into my relationships. Which isn't necessarily a bad thing unless they cause me to care more about securing those friendships than building my relationship with God. That seems to happen way too often.
- The second is that I am now more than ever 100% certain that I'm called to work with teenagers. I have such a passion for Diverge and to see these teens become on-fire young men and women of God. There is so much potential in each and every one of them and I am just so thankful to be a part of it.
I'm still not sure how God is going to have me work with teens as a profession. Before about a month ago, if you had brought up the idea of me going to grad school I probably would have laughed at you. But recently I've been thinking about going for my master's in counseling and possibly being a high school counselor. This is all still up in the air. I just want to make a difference in the lives of teenagers and I'll do whatever God calls me to. If I'm going to do the whole grad school thing, I really need to step up my game in my classes. I'm a big time slacker. :[
- Third, it is so important to have people in your life that will give you a good kick in the rear when you need it. I am so blessed to have the women of God in my life that I do. They keep me in check. They hold me accountable. And they speak into my life when I need it the most. They're incredible.
- Fourth, GenesisChurch.tv is the strongest body of believers I have ever seen. Especially the staff. They are amazing. I really don't know how they do it. I love this church so much and I am so thankful to be on this journey with everyone at Genesis. God is going to do something completely out of this world with this church. I can't wait to see what it is.
- Fifth, I miss the Florida State football team from the 90s. Losing sucks :(
So I think that's pretty much it. Either that or it's almost 2:30 am and I'm tired. Ha. I'm really going to try to get into the blog scene once again. I'll try to keep the others to a bit shorter ;p
I'm not even going to attempt to fully catch up on everything that has happened in the last year. So much stuff has gone on that it would take me hours to write it all down. I'll try to state just brief lessons I learned.
- The main one is that I give my heart away way to easily. I've had my heart broken twice in the past seven months. The first was the worst thing I've ever had to go through. But through it, I learned how much strength I have inside of me and how much I have with God. I really don't know how people get through times like that without God. I know I couldn't have without Him. The second I'm still semi-dealing with. It's nothing like the first, but I'm still slowly gaining my heart back and giving it back to God. (Which is where it should have stayed.) There was a minor heart ache between the two but I think I knew that that was not where my heart needed to be the whole time so it wasn't as bad.
I really need to learn how to not give away my heart so easily. I need to learn how to find full satisfaction in God and not in relationships. That goes for my friendships too. I put so much of my heart into my relationships. Which isn't necessarily a bad thing unless they cause me to care more about securing those friendships than building my relationship with God. That seems to happen way too often.
- The second is that I am now more than ever 100% certain that I'm called to work with teenagers. I have such a passion for Diverge and to see these teens become on-fire young men and women of God. There is so much potential in each and every one of them and I am just so thankful to be a part of it.
I'm still not sure how God is going to have me work with teens as a profession. Before about a month ago, if you had brought up the idea of me going to grad school I probably would have laughed at you. But recently I've been thinking about going for my master's in counseling and possibly being a high school counselor. This is all still up in the air. I just want to make a difference in the lives of teenagers and I'll do whatever God calls me to. If I'm going to do the whole grad school thing, I really need to step up my game in my classes. I'm a big time slacker. :[
- Third, it is so important to have people in your life that will give you a good kick in the rear when you need it. I am so blessed to have the women of God in my life that I do. They keep me in check. They hold me accountable. And they speak into my life when I need it the most. They're incredible.
- Fourth, GenesisChurch.tv is the strongest body of believers I have ever seen. Especially the staff. They are amazing. I really don't know how they do it. I love this church so much and I am so thankful to be on this journey with everyone at Genesis. God is going to do something completely out of this world with this church. I can't wait to see what it is.
- Fifth, I miss the Florida State football team from the 90s. Losing sucks :(
So I think that's pretty much it. Either that or it's almost 2:30 am and I'm tired. Ha. I'm really going to try to get into the blog scene once again. I'll try to keep the others to a bit shorter ;p
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